I am now officially open for business at Catscrap & MScraps after a crazy long month (and a half!) of getting everything updated and transferred. The down side is I still have a lot of 'unpacking' to do, as in uploading ALL of my products. But I'm determined to get everything finished and in both of my shops before the month is up. Once that's done, I can really feel 'moved in'!

When I found out Little Dreamers was closing, we were in the middle of refinishing our hardwood floors (ourselves, mind you--and no, we're not typically masochists!) Needless to say, I had my plate pretty full at the time and was panicked about what to do. Ever since I started designing for LDD after the apprentice contest, I struggled to keep up with the pace of designing. It can be VERY overwhelming, since in order to do well in this business, you have to promote yourself or you're dead in the water. And I was using all my efforts just to keep up with the design part of it. (I was completely new to Photoshop CS2, so I was literally learning how to use it during the LDD apprentice contest!) I had no idea how to advertise or get myself out there.

Also, when you become a designer, it's rare that you ever find time to scrap for yourself. So after a year or so of treading water with designing, and just trying to keep up, I lost touch with my passion for scrapping. It became work. I forgot to have fun with it. I also went through some painful disruptions in my life that took away my desire to scrap about anything, much less design happy, life-celebrating products for others. So I slunk away from designing for a while, opened myself up to other, newer passions (which I'm sure I'll blabber about sooner or later, LOL) and discovered something I really needed: perspective & self-acceptance.

It has been an long road, coming out of a years-long fog. I wouldn't necessarily call it depression, but more of a disconnect from everything. Some days were really bad. Other were okay. It's been a long time since I've felt joy-- a necessary component of being a memory artist. Scrapbooking is all about celebrating life and embracing joy, something you can't do when you're under a little black raincloud. But once the storm passes, it's amazing how beautiful the sunshine is, when you've spent so much time away from it. These last few months have been the most incredible of my life, experiencing gratitude and awe at everything I never knew I had. Before I realized it, I'd found my joy, right where I left it. :)

After I learned  LDD was closing, I was disheartened because I had planned to come back to designing full time now that I was in a good place in my life. But a split-second later I was offered several opportunities through other stores, and realized it was a sign that this is what I should be doing. I have been very welcomed at both Catscrap & MScraps, the designers and owners there are uber nice! I feel very blessed that I get to help others preserve their memories and express gratitude for their lives through scrapbooking, and I hope that whatever little contribution I can make to that process will add to others lives, just as other scrappers in the digi-community have for me.

Long story longer, I'm SO excited to be back designing. Creating is like oxygen to me, and it's like a breath of fresh air planning out products and color schemes again. That said, while the creative process is very inspiring for me, I've been forcing myself to learn how to market myself and it's been painful, to say the least. Even this blog has been full of growing pains for me. I'm typically cyber-shy, because I either can't think of anything clever to say, or else I ramble on and on and on (case in point!). But, I've just decided to get over it and DO IT, even though I don't know what I'm doing exactly.

I have to admit that social media overwhelms me. I've never been a huge fan of Facebook or Twitter or  the idea of creating a blog, only because there are a million things I'd rather do than be glued to a computer for  hours (I already do that designing!). It seems very time consuming and complicated at first glance. But I've swallowed by impatience and am learning it's not so hard after all. :) So, keep in mind this little blog of mine is very much a work in progress, and while I have BIG plans to make this a fun place to come for inspiration, freebies and info about by new products, it will have to happen with baby steps. I am also working on a 'mission statement', because I have some great ideas for new approaches to this fun little craft we all love, and I can't wait to share them with you! Until then, I'll finish unpacking at my new digital homes and hope to see you soon!